Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Wednesday morning surprise

Ugh. I saw peen on OKCupid today. Now I'm only on two dating sites.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Can someone throw me a freakin bone??

I probably shouldn't even blog about this, but I'm going to because it explains what I've been forced to deal with lately.

I met a dude on a dating site. Super cool guy. Went through the motions with eHarmony, matched in each others' values, even exchanged a few emails, etc., etc., etc. He calls me and we're having a decent conversation. We get on the subject of traveling and I tell him about my fabulous trip from Rome to Athens last summer and how I got to see the Parthenon, which I've wanted to see for around 10 years. I joked about how I thought I was going to shed actual tears when I saw it for the first time.

When he asked me what and where the Parthenon was, I was a bit worried. I kindly explained that it was in Greece and probably one of the most famous, most historical buildings there. He then explained that he had gone to Greece, but couldn't remember what he saw. I figured it was a trip he took when he was younger. Nope, he said he went 2 years ago. Two years ago???? Ummmmm..... And he totally wasn't trying to be funny.

So he tells me that he's going to email me some pictures to prove he was there and I jokingly said I'd probably have to tell him what he was standing in front of.

I get the email from him today and I open the attachment that is the picture, thinking it'd be some obscure ruin somewhere on the side of the road. (If you've never been to Greece, there are in fact obscure ruins everywhere. They just build around them.) When it finally opens, it's a freakin picture of him

He honestly had no idea. Really. None. The thing is, there are signs everywhere. He had to walk up a giant hill to get there. THE OLYMPICS WERE IN ATHENS JUST 5 YEARS AGO!!! How does this guy, a seemingly bright 31-year old, not know what the Parthenon is???? I mean, I get it. History is kind of a passion of mine, especially ancient civilizations. But I learned about the Parthenon when I was in college. It's a pretty recognizable building. Is it not?? And even if it's not, isn't it something you should know if you've been there, standing in front of it??

Help me out here, this is not what is left out there for me, is it?? Please tell me it gets better than this.

Since I had already told the guy I'd meet him for drinks, I'm following through on that and will meet him later this week. But I'm worried. I've already practiced the "I've got plans this weekend," just in case. What plans? Family. Friends. Babysitting my niece. I'm a horrible liar, I have to have this stuff prepared so that I'm not caught off guard, stumbling for an excuse.

Ugh. Please tell me it gets better. Please.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Online Dating 101

It's funny that 7 months ago, I was mostly against internet dating sites. I thought (and still kinda do) that it was interfering with fate. I felt it was trying too hard to find someone and that there was a level of desperation going into it.

But I tried it anyway. I was convinced that getting myself out there was being proactive, rather than just waiting for social opportunities in my life. The first place I tried was I did a 3 month trial, found a couple of guys, but nothing went further than the phone, for whatever reasons. I didn't renew my subscription there. Toward the end of my Match subscription, a friend told me about, which is free. I've met a number of guys there, even went out with one, bit no luck there. I'm still on that site.

As if being sent a sign, I kept seeing eHarmony commercials, so I joined. I have to admit, eHarmony seems the most serious. You don't go out and find matches, they match you with people who they think you are compatible with, based on a pretty long and extensive survey you take when you sign up. Then, once you are matched, you have to go through a guided process of questions and answers before you can actually talk to them. Of course you can opt out of the guided process, but to me, it tells you a lot about if you really share the same values. I've only been on eHarmony for about a week.

Last week, I was told about, which is another free site. This one is entertaining because you can take lame, but fun, Facebook-like quizzes. I still don't understand what a Quiver is and my profile on this one is probably the most smartass of all. I'm a trained professional at making profiles now.

So, needless to say, I've been involved in online "dating" for about 7 months. Since the beginning, I haven't been super into it. I don't pursue guys (though I have started to on eHarmony) and I'm pretty picky about the ones I do email back. I could care less if I get emails or winks or quivers. But at the same time, it has been quite a confidence booster to see the emails coming in periodically.

Online dating isn't any easier. The guys still don't know what they want. They still lie about things and don't follow through on things they say they are going to do. But it's becoming easier to care less about it. A friend of mine had a conversation with me the other day about how she met her husband on a dating site. She told me about how the process of being on dating sites wasn't easy, but it was kinda fun. She said she got good at dating and meeting for coffee or a drink for the first time. She got good at not accepting last minute dates. She went out with so many guys at a time and kept so busy that she wasn't really ever "waiting" for a call or a lame ass text. She learned that the right guy and good guy would never make her wonder if he wanted to hang out or get to know her.

So this is the thing. I've never really just dated. I've always met someone, and dated only them until it evolved into a relationship or died. I figure this is my time to learn this stuff. I don't want to wait around for a guy to text or call or ask me out. And I don't anymore. Which is weird. I'm not used to just being like, "Meh, whatever. If he calls, he calls." That so wasn't me. But it's becoming me now.

So with that, I say bring it. Let's do this shit.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

I heart my momma

Last week I got a phone call from my mom. She wanted to know if I wanted to buy the summer package for Disneyland with her. We'd get a Park Hopper for any 3 days in the summer for $99. If you've been to Disneyland, you know this is a freakin amazing price for THREE Park Hoppers (especially a summer price). So yeah, she and I bought the packages. When she said it, I thought she wanted to do it so we could take my niece when we went. But it amazed me when she said she just wanted it to be her and I.

So yesterday, my mom and I did our first of three trips to Disneyland. It was fun. We spent the morning/afternoon at California Adventure (she hasn't been yet). I will admit, it was freakin HOT waiting in some of those lines, but hanging out with my mom all day was fun. I took her on the Soaring Over California ride (which she loved) and she wanted to wait in a 4o-minute line for the Toy Story ride. I wasn't super excited to wait in that line (during the hottest part of the day), but I did it. The ride was hilarious. You and your partner compete in a number of shooting competitions (carnival-style). I was kicking her butt after each one, but then at the end she won.

We shared lunch, sat on a bench in front of the Matterhorn to rest for over an hour, and found a pretty good spot for the fireworks show about an hour and a half before the show started. My mom and I are pretty close anyway, but I found that yesterday she and got to talk about a lot of things that we don't usually talk about.

My mom takes care of her mom every weekend. My grandma was prescribed medicine for dementia/psychitsophrenia/bipolar about 2 years ago. It's been a difficult 2 years for my my mom, seeing my grandma deteriorate. She and my dad have been taking care of my grandma on weekends and my aunt stays at my grandma's house on weekdays. My grandma can't be alone because she won't eat and she won't take her meds. If she doesn't take her meds, she becomes very paranoid that someone's trying to break in or that someone has broken in. It's very sad.

Yesterday I got to hear my mom talk about what an amazing help my dad has been in this situation. It's funny, because growing up, I knew my parents loved each other, but never heard them say it. It actually kinda bothers me that my family is not a family that says "I love you" all the time. But yesterday, hearing my mom talk about the kinds of things my dad was doing to help out with my grandma, it became evident to me how much my dad loves my mom (and how much she loves him) and what a wonderful man he is to her. It almost made me cry, to be honest. She even told me that she hoped I find a guy like my dad, at one point.

Needless to say, I can't wait for us to hang out again. I love that I have such an amazing relationship with my momma.

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Shred: Day Negative 1

So I like to work out. Well, I like to work out when I am actually doing the workout, but getting me there is a pain in the ass. And sometimes I get super bored with doing the same thing over and over and over... so I'm always looking for new ways to stay/get in shape.

I used to play soccer, but the drive to the field where the league played was just too much. I trained for and ran a halfer. Once I met that challenge, I went back to hating running (and what is was doing to my feet, ugh). I tried crossfit and loved it, but where I was doing it was a pain to get to at 5:00 now that I'm on summer vacation. I like to hike and was doing that for a bit, but then I got sick and I never went back to it. I know... excuses, excuses.

So one of my friends (a friend of a friend that has become a friend since my last trip to Texas) posted something on Facebook (woot woot!) about wanting to start the Jillian Michaels' 30-Day Shred on Tuesday (tomorrow). One person responding turned into her starting a group on Facebook, now with about 30 members from all over. All of us are starting The Shred tomorrow and are going to keep each other motivated through the group on Facebook. I'm so ridiculously excited. It's a new activity and I actually have others to keep me motivated. And from what I understand, that shit works!!

Interested in joining us? Let me know. You can start at any time, even if it's not when we start tomorrow.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Lonely, party of one

I'm kinda lonely lately. I mean, I have friends that I hang out with and I know I have a ton of people who care about me. But I'm just lonely. I wonder how long before I finally get to share my life with someone. I'm ready. I'm ready to settle down and do this. I feel like my baggage has been dealt with and I'm ready to be in love again. For real. But it's not happening.

My dad asked me the other day if I liked living by myself. And I do. Completely. I'm not depressed and holed up inside (besides the whole being sick for 2 weeks episode), I just want to move on to the next chapter in my life. I want to stop going to family functions alone. I want to have a workout partner. I want to have a partner, in general. And sometimes I wonder if it'll ever happen.

This will probably sound ridiculous and totally lame, but for some reason, I can't imagine myself on my wedding day. I mean, I could imagine myself graduating from college. I could imagine myself in a classroom in front of kids. I could imagine myself crossing the finish line when I did my halfer last year. But I can't imagine myself getting married. Is that a sign?? Does that mean it's not going to happen? That honestly scares the shit outta me.

So I wait. Like I always do. I be patient and have faith that the reason I'm having to wait so long is because what I'll finally end up with will be more than I could have ever hoped for. My faith is just wearing thin lately...

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

My MJ memorial

So yesterday I was fortunate enough to be able to go to the MJ Memorial at the Staples Center. A friend of mine "won" tickets and invited me to go.

I don't think I realized the magnitude of this event until I was actually there. I was sitting in a (very large) room with so many influential people. I think it hit me when Stevie Wonder was helped on stage. WTF? Stevie Wonder? I knew he'd be there, but when it all went down, I was overwhelmed.

And this is the thing. Say what you want about Michael Jackson, the man was a freakin genius. And he deserved to have his life celebrated yesterday. I don't know one person my age who wasn't trying to do the moonwalk at some point in their lives. I don't know one person who didn't secretly (or not-so-secretly) want the red leather jacket or the sequined white glove. I don't know one person who doesn't remember the first time they saw the Thriller video. I can tell you where I was: My mom got ahold of the video (now that I think about it, it was kinda odd that she got it) and she invited all the neighborhood kids in to watch it. I don't know what it is about that video and song, but it scares the shit outta me. To this day, I can't listen to it without getting creeped out. But I would pay a pretty penny to get my hands on the documentary of that video.

I will admit, when Michael was accused of all the child molestation stuff back in the day, I thought the man was guilty. Freak, child molester, pervert... all those names rolled off my tongue. But this is the thing... I don't know if I believe it anymore. I think the man had an f-ed up childhood/life. He didn't get to ever be a child. He was pushed into the spotlight at 5-years old and his stardom increased from there. So the whole Neverland makes sense. He didn't ever want to grow up and always wanted to be the kid he never got to be. I think that, yes, he did some questionable things with some of those kids. Things that we might deem as completely inappropriate. But do I think he molested anyone? No. I honestly don't. Not after what I saw yesterday.

I think Brooke Shields' eulogy was the one that hit home the most for me. She talked about how fun and full of love he was. She described him as non-jaded. Somehow, I believe that. I believe that he loved to perform and felt like that was what he was put on this Earth to do. He was at home on stage. He loved to make people happy. But off-stage, his life was in such a bubble, he was considered a freak. I considered him a freak, I'll admit. But everyone that knew him well described him as someone with a huge heart. I will believe that that was who he was. Not the sideshow that the media made him out to be.

And one more thing... his kids. Seriously, what beautiful and awesome kids he has. For the first time, we got to see them without masks, without umbrellas, without the boundaries that were put on them. This man wasn't just an entertainer for us. He was a father. And a seemingly great one at that.

Yesterday was a time for me to lay to rest the negativity that I've believed for the past few years. I realized that he was an icon whose music shaped my childhood. I realized that he was a wonderful person and father, who just wanted to make others happy.

What a wonderful experience that I got to be a part of. The magnitude of it is just beginning to set in.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Because I can

Yeah, I changed it. I get bored easily. And I like the new, bright colors. They're purdy.